Don't Shame Me

Lalitha Murali • February 15, 2025

I retired from teaching in July, 2024. I don’t miss it. I loved the students and loved the teachers I worked with, but I’m happy to be done. I taught for 29 years and felt that I made an impact every year, especially with my gifted students. I wake up when I want to and stay up late every single night. I can travel during the school year. It’s an excellent existence. 


This is also my last year on the WATG Board. In October I will have been on the board for 25 years.


So now what do I have to contribute? 


One of my part time jobs is data entry for a law firm. No chance there. The other job, however, allows me to work with high school students. I coach them to increase their scores on the ACT. it’s nice, and the students are driven to get their score and get into the school of their choice. They don't necessarily have gifted education needs, but they do need my help. 


In this capacity I met Austin.


Me: So, what are your goals for our sessions?
Austin:
I want to increase my English score on the ACT. It brought my overall score down in December.
Me:
Okay. What is your goal for English?
Austin:
I got a 30 on English, and I'd like it to be a 34.


Austin’s eyes challenge me to shame him, to tell him that a 30 is a great score and he should be happy with it. Most kids would kill for a 30. I resist and do not shame. I know that would be so offensive to him and completely uncalled for. 


Me: Okay. Sounds good. What did you get on the other subjects?
Austin:
I got a 36 in reading, 35 in math and 35 in science.
Me:
So a 34 in English is doable. Do you know what your target schools need for a score?
Austin:
Northwestern is a 34, I think. My second choice is Michigan and they’re around the same, maybe a bit lower.
Me:
Do you know what you want to study?
Austin:
Psychiatry or Music. I’m not sure.
Me:
Well that is very normal for gifted individuals. It’s called multipotentiality. You could do really well in either. It probably feels like if you choose psychiatry, you have to mourn the loss of music and vice versa. If you choose music, you might regret letting go of psychiatry.


Austin squints. Then his eyes widen when he realizes that I am not telling him to choose.


Austin: Yeah.
Me:
Well, the good news is that you can do both. Eventually. Lots of people find a way. This is so normal for gifted people. You can work both of those things into your life.


Austin’s eyes soften and a smile curls across his face.


Me: Let’s get to work and get your 34.


And this is one way to help gifted kids reach their dreams.



By Sarah Kasprowicz, WATG Past President and Board Member

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