Parents—We WANT to partner with you!

I am a parent of four wonderful boys—the youngest will graduate from high school this year.   That’s thirteen years of education for each of them—52 years altogether.  The overall experiences they had were great. But every now and again I had a question or a concern about how much one of them was learning.  So I know how hard it can be to ask a question or advocate for your child.  You worry that you might rock the boat or cause a problem. You think, “What if the teacher just thinks I’m a pushy parent?” Will the teacher feel it’s personal if I say my child is disengaged in the class work?  How do I ask if the teacher will please pre-test my child to find out what he/she already knows…because through conversations at home I know his frustration is growing to the point that it impacting his behavior?  
I’ve had a few of these conversations over the years.  The truth is most of them went well—some did not.   What made the difference between the ones that were more productive than others?  I think it had to do with my approach. Over the years I learned these valuable lessons:

1. Connect with your child’s teacher early in the year and stay connected.  Take the time to help the teacher get to know your child as a learner—share things he/she might not know unless someone shared the information.
2. Become a partner with the teacher.  You are in the relationship of helping your child get the most out of school.  Ask how you can support your child’s learning.
3. Share social emotional information with the teacher.  Gifted students may have heightened awareness, anxiety, perfectionism, stress issues with peer relationships clear.  Understanding your student’s struggles as well as their areas of strength will help the teacher build upon both.
4. Be clear about what is not working for your child and what changes could help.  Sometimes a small change can make a drastic difference.
5. Help your child become a self advocate.  Even young children can communicate their need for something different if they are taught to respectfully speak up.  Teach your child to ask, “Could I please try…”  “Would it be ok to show my learning in this way…” “I learn best when…is there a way I could do that?”  

These are the bones I stuck to as I guided myself through the educational system.  You can find more ideas on how to advocate for your child through these resources:
NAGC
Davidson Institute
Hoagies